GROUPTHINK GROUPTHINK GROUPTHINK.
It seems wherever you look in the skeptiverse, ‘Groupthink’ has gone absolutely ape-viral! All the most skeptical skeptics have caught the Groupthink! meme, and if you’re not talking about GROUPTHINK then, frankly, you should feel intense social shame. You’ve obviously been living in a cave, and I suggest you go back there.
It’s not our job at CliScep to do your homework for you. So if you still don’t know what Groupthink™ is—hint: it’s only the hottest meme on the Intertubez right now—I’m not going to walk you through it.
I probably couldn’t if I wanted to. Some people (*cough*) just weren’t meant to grasp certain concepts.
No offense, but wouldn’t you be happier among your own kind?
Everyone: please raise your hand if all these jokes about Groupthink® are going over your head. Be honest. There’s no wrong answer.
Just one? Fair enough. All right, now would the individual with her hand up please be a dear and… [makes buggering-off motion using ambulant fingers]?
OK, we’ll just wait while our… no, that’s the entry, dear—the exit door’s the other way… wait while our
friend colleague conspecific contemporary figures out the difference between PUSH and HSUP. [General hooting.]
Othered by her own hopelessly helpless cluelessness! Talk about awkward.
All right, now that we’re rid of the, shall we say [inaudible due to snickering] element , erm… good meeting, Group.
We’re adjourned. Solid work.
Oh! Don’t forget to bring those sharpened pottery shards for next time. We have a very special guest coming in who’s going to try to explain all about the etymological link between ostrakoi and climate ostriches, only to be ostracised mid-lecture in a humorously brutal fashion. It’s always our most popular session, so, as they say: be there or beware. Because no absence goes unnoticed.
All right, simmer down over there—it sounds like someone’s guessed the name of this year’s invitee—yes: it’s Dr Victim Venema [sic], OK, all right? Well done. So we’re going to need to be on our best [inaudible due to widespread hatred] ….give him a warm Group welcome.
It doesn’t work if they suspect.
Come on, disperse already. Save the venom for your homework. Remember: you’re all expected to be putting in Two Minutes Hate ter in die, with meals.
Religiously. That’s Latin for t.i.d.
Go home, people. What are you milling around here for? You do have robust identities and self-images independent of Group, don’t you?